1
Of the Word Trust
Trust : a five lettered word with a thousand meaning.
Buildings have gone up and come down with the mere mention of it.
Promises have gone sour and stale with the lack of it.
Day in day out we search for it.
Is trust really worth all this? That a one in a million chance you decide to do without it, the past fades and the present glares at you...without much as a second chance.
Trust the five lettered word, that Kings and Paupers dream of, wish for and await for.
Trust that the love will never fade.
Trust that you will ind a way out of the maze.
Trust that it will all work out and get some rest.
Trust that you will get what you deserve amongst the 'untrusted'.
I stare, I wonder,what is the absence of trust? The opposite of trust?Would the world rotate without it?
Do we have trust?do we trust ourselves?others?others to lay our lives and welll being on?
Trust : five letters with a thousand meanings. Depends on which one you opt for.
2
Apart
I remember our parting
How you called my name
How I turned and looked at you standing there
Holding the umbrella
Eunice
Eunice
Talk to me
Talk to you?
About what?
I felt like shouting back at you
But I cant, I wouldn’t let myself even if I wanted.
What’s with the distance between us?
It is widening sweetie
It is big, deep and treacherous
I know am pushy and I want things to go my way
I know I asked you to come along with me
You know why?
Coz of the distance that’s drifting us apart
I wanted to have some time with you even for a moment
To hear your voice
To see your face
To bring us back to our one part
I wanted you to myself
But
But
I didn’t know how to say it
Or if I did, I said it wrongly
I just watched you walk away again today
Clutching at the umbrella
Rainy days ahead
As we walked away
We glide further apart
I walk south
You are on North.
3
Don't talk to me
Don’t talk to me
Not just yet
Let my anger capsize and don’t apologize either
Let me first think of the joy we had
The bright days of hope, of commitment
Of resounding laughter
Stay away from me
Not because I hate you
No, on the contrary
I love you
Your love is poison to my veins
It’s made me useless without you
It’s made me limp
Again, I don’t hate you
I love you so
Let me cool, let be spoon over this
Let me think of you
Let me
Let me
Let me be
I said
Don’t talk to me
Not just yet.
4
One too Many
Why can’t I laugh?
Why should I carry this burden in my heart?
Honestly, I dread happiness because I know; sadness and anger are on the same vein.
The frowns have quickly displaced the smiles, the laughter the joy we had.
It smells purple, unripe, unfulfilled not complete.
I love us, I hate us.
Will we withstand it all till the hour down the aisle?
Is this one of the many heartbreaks?
The one too many?
Should I hope for this?
Should I believe in this?
Should I sacrifice for this?
I am taking you for granted?
You are taking me for granted.
Am I right for you?
Maybe am one of the many mistakes in your life
The one too many hiccups of your neat self.
I look at you and I wonder to myself, am I worth this?
Honestly, I am tired of
The fake smiles
Uncertain hope
Bitter optimism
Fuzzy future
I just was to tack myself in bed, cry myself back to sense
And hope this is among the one too many lessons in this class called life.
5
Sweat and Tears
Sweat and tears
All have near
Sweat to learn
Sweat to earn
Sweat for fun
Sweat and churn
Sweat and sweat
Press and wait
Wait and waste
In sweat and tears.
Sweat and tears
All have near
Tears from hurt
Tears from fights
Night to night
Drown in fright
Tears of fear
Tears from jeer
Tear and tear
Sweat and tears
In piles and tiers
Near and nears.
6
Not a bed of Roses
Not a bed of roses.
Guess honeymoon does come to an end.
But to think of the many good times we shared.
The laughs we had.
The jokes we told.
Now,I stand out in the cold.
Looking at the crevice..the large crack unfold.
Hoping it will be put on hold.
Wondering if I can unscroll back to..
That brighter day..and..
Mend it
Repair it
I'm fighting back tears...I never loved love.
It always hurt bad.
I'm still wondering why am still waiting for you..out here in the cold.
I thought love was warm.
But then again,its not a bed of roses.
Never been.
Guess honeymoon does come to an end.
But to think of the many good times we shared.
The laughs we had.
The jokes we told.
Now,I stand out in the cold.
Looking at the crevice..the large crack unfold.
Hoping it will be put on hold.
Wondering if I can unscroll back to..
That brighter day..and..
Mend it
Repair it
I'm fighting back tears...I never loved love.
It always hurt bad.
I'm still wondering why am still waiting for you..out here in the cold.
I thought love was warm.
But then again,its not a bed of roses.
Never been.
7
At Hells-Pital
Patients staring at each other,
Fever,pain,ache,
Queued:waiting their turn.
On either sides of the waiting area.
In the next room
Push! Push! PUSH!
New,innocent and fragile baby groomed.
Born to the cold gloom.
THUD!on its way to the nursery,
On the floor it lay,
Quickly picked.
The white floor stained,RED.
Within grace period,
Mother holds her child,
The weak smile curves.
Something is a miss.
The baby,
Mute and pale,
Swollen purple head.
Echoes of silence.
Two generations smashed,
Who to blame?
The busy quack?the trainee?
Or the overcrowded facility?
MOVE!Another patient needs the bed,
Duty had been done,
Certified in black and white.
No witnesses.
Save for the clock,which stood in silence.
Mother and Child,
Two broken spirits,
Leave to a future.
A misty foggy future.
Patients staring at each other,
Waiting their turn.
Their turn at Hells-pital.
Fever,pain,ache,
Queued:waiting their turn.
On either sides of the waiting area.
In the next room
Push! Push! PUSH!
New,innocent and fragile baby groomed.
Born to the cold gloom.
THUD!on its way to the nursery,
On the floor it lay,
Quickly picked.
The white floor stained,RED.
Within grace period,
Mother holds her child,
The weak smile curves.
Something is a miss.
The baby,
Mute and pale,
Swollen purple head.
Echoes of silence.
Two generations smashed,
Who to blame?
The busy quack?the trainee?
Or the overcrowded facility?
MOVE!Another patient needs the bed,
Duty had been done,
Certified in black and white.
No witnesses.
Save for the clock,which stood in silence.
Mother and Child,
Two broken spirits,
Leave to a future.
A misty foggy future.
Patients staring at each other,
Waiting their turn.
Their turn at Hells-pital.
8
Is it because I am a caged animal??
Behind these bars.
This cage.
Baring both my physical and mental liberty.
In here,90 or even more of us instead of the stipulated 20.
The sweat and puke is nauseating.Then again bhang!!
How do they get in here???
Pen and paper I have not.
Blood for ink and these dirty walls for my paper.
Yesterday one of us succumbed to food poisoning.
Hmmm..I am infected with TB not to mention lice and skin rash.
I used to cry.
Those were the days.
Now am hardened;a stone.
Rumors!!
Public flogging.
WHY?? I ask.
The wardens suspect information about here is leaking out!!!
''its about time'', I say.
Interestingly,its block 4C.
US!!
We are facing the whip!!!
CLANG!!CLANG!!CLANG!! The locks flung open.Our punishment meted out.
REMOVE YOUR CLOTHES!!!
Stand in two lines!!
The cold makes me NUMB ;but the idea of me smelling blood AGAIN makes me NUMBER.
For a moment I defy gravity
Am floating on a sea of bodies.
JESUS!! The cold is slapping at our nude bodies.
A nudist colony.
We step out of the cell,sunlight mocking us.
prayers and cries.
We lie on the floor covered in black polythene paper-probably to dispose off any evidence after the ''session''.
My next mate is in a trance, and asks
''Why are you here?,why are you here?''
Before i could answer,doors on all corners of the now 'flogging field' flung open.
In came about 40 armed men.
Simis,Rungus,mallets and metal bars.
Are they going MINING??
A stampede ensued.
Then the dreaded smell,screams,strokes of cane;beatings.
Oh my leg..my head.
Is that an EYE?? Blood,Screams,Insults,Shoving,Pushing,Mess.
Gradually,the noise recede :DARKNESS and then..BLACKOUT!!!!
Is that the proverbial white light???
Grandpa??
Aunty??
Serenity.
At least I can now...
